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I believe that the holy grail that we have been all looking for (especially those who hit the mid life crises) is built on a solid foundation of your own values. 

Values are black and white - they don't have grey areas (actually they do when they are evolving but with time they become black and white). As you grow and experience life, it is very natural for you to adjust your values as circumstances dictate them. If not - then others will see you as someone with no values. The basic foundation for what you stand for and have built starts to be challenged, and then the challenge within starts to dis integrate you thus impacting life, career etc.,

Let us take the career route for a second - If your values at work are challenged, you start to doubt yourself and the challenges within self starts dis engagement in yourself and your team. Once you have a core set of values you must realize that not all people have the same life experiences and some of your values can be mis-understood as strong, weak, mis-directed etc.,

You need to educate your self (self analyze) and then others of your values and have an open discussion on them with yourself, family, friends. If differences in values are clearly understood among people (due to different experiences, challenges, background etc.,) then automatically your Emotional Intelligence starts to increase. 

A family and team is a living and breathing organism and members are constantly having different life experiences, which mold their values, views, thoughts etc., As a leader and as a person, you need to recognize when a large shift in member is occurring and discuss this change so as not to create disruption. And continue sanity within and around you.

A frame of mind of "what can I do to make those around me help achieve my goals" vs. " what can they do for me: needs to be in place for a long term culture of productivity, happiness, and success. That to me is a success in life and a clean, crisp value. 

Posted by Nauman Jaffar on 29th Nov 2014
https://www.linkedin.com/in/naumanjaffar
www.markitech.ca
www.jandpassociates.com